Surviving Saigon's Fall: The Life of Duc Nguyen
Profilers: Angella Ferrer, Evan Lu, Salvador Goya Perloiro, Seenaa Dafa, Anastasia Ramirez
Leaving Vietnam and Journey to the United States
Can you tell us your name, age you were in Vietnam, and your role in the war?
My name is Duc Nguyen. I was born in 1953. So, we moved from the north to the south when I was just one year old. In April 30th, 1975, the fall of Saigon, I was 21 plus. During the war, I was a student at the high school and National Institute of Technology. I’m in the mechanical engineering department. And the only role that I play during the war was that everyone, when you reach 18, you have to join the local armed forces. They just give you a gun. So, I believe every two weeks, it’s your turn to go to guard the neighborhood. But, my mom, she scared. Most of the time, we would hire someone to do the guarding for us. But, I still have a gun at home in my bedroom. But, we didn’t do anything.
What was your journey like arriving to the United States?
Oh, it start I believe the early morning. That was Monday, April 21st. Any normal day. So, I went to school and I was so surprised that the whole campus gate was locked up. And I asked myself, “What the heck?”
There is a little side door that is open. So, I got into the campus through that side door to go into my mechanical engineering department. And there, the gate was closed too. And there’s just a little sign saying, “The school is closed for indefinite.”
So, I know, uh oh, something, something wrong. And I go to the back of the school, we have a coffee shop there. So, I saw some of my friends and asked them, “What’s going on?”
And they say, “We don’t know!”
I just have a cup of coffee there. And then I went home. And on my way home, I saw my parents. They are in the car running the opposite direction. And then as soon as he saw me, he blow the horn: beep beep beep beep! And I know something is wrong. So, I turn around and I catch up with him and he said: “Go back home, take whatever clothes you want, and we meet you at *inaudible* certain address”.
I said, “Uh oh.”
So, I did go home- put all of my book and material down, and just pack up a few clothes. And then, I go to the address where we all met. And then later in the afternoon, there’s an American. He came and pick us up in a van. And he took us to the airport. And we wait there till very late at night. Then a bus come to pick us up, and take us to the end of the runway. There was a C-130. They just landed, but they just go all the way to the end of the runway. They turned around and with the engine still running, they wait. So, the bus rushed us to that airplane. And then we got on the airplane. And I still remember, there, it’s the C-130 and it’s the military airplane. There’s no seatbelt or whatever. Everybody sit on the floor. So, I held my mom because the ramp is very steep.
So, I help her to get inside. And when everybody got inside and I looked back and I say, “There’s still a lot of elderly people trying to get on without any help.”
So I say, “Ok- you guys sit here and I go in the back and help them.”
So, I was actually the last person who got on that airplane. I still remember the airman, he gave me the thumb up and said, “Thank you for helping me to help the people to get on board.”
So, very shortly the plane took off and took us from Tan Son Nhat Airport, Saigon to Clark Air Force Base. It’s just outside of Manila. It’s a few hours long flight. And the most scary thing that I still remember is, about 30 minutes in flight, all of a sudden we heard a very loud bang. And then all of a sudden, the airplane lost altitude. I say, “Oh my god, we got hit- we got hit!”
That’s what I thought in my mind. But then, it slowly regained its altitude. And later on, I talked to my friend who was the pilot. And they said that, “No, that’s standard procedure to avoid being hit from the ground.” They turned on the flare. That’s why I heard all of the noises. And the flare would attract all of the hitted guy’s missiles. So, we got to Clark Air Force Base. We wait maybe for a couple of hours. And then we got on the C-141 and that took us to Guam. And that’s the beginning of our refugee camp. We stay in the refugee camp in Guam, maybe for 10 days. And then they took us to Camp Pendleton, which is an hour *away* refugee camp in California. And I couldn’t believe how cold it was!
“Why is it so cold?”
The camp was getting crowded. So, they say, “Who want to be transferred to Fort Chaffee?”
My dad he said, “Oh! Fort Chaffee is in the middle between the west coast and the east coast, and eventually we want to go to the east coast, so let’s go half-way!” So, that’s why we all got on another plane to Fort Chaffee. And we stayed there, maybe- a few weeks. We left and moved to Virginia to stay with Bà June- the eldest sister in the family. So, that’s the beginning of the end of our journey from Saigon to the USA. But, I always told my friend that, “Wow! We are the very, very lucky few.”
Because, when I heard of my friends, they have to fight for their place on the boat in the Saigon Harbor. Or, fighting for their place while they are trying to climb into the U.S. embassy. And that was a nightmare. It’s very blessing that we all got here safely.
How did your family feel about the journey?
Personally, I feel very calm because when I graduate from high school, which was three years before that, my dream was going to study abroad. But in the summer of 1972, there was a big offense attack by the North. So, they changed the rules, so I was eligible for going to go abroad, then, the next week they said nope! You’re no longer allowed to go abroad. So, I was very upset because all of my effort trying to get good grades, being a good student… And not just me, Some of my friends in the class doing the same thing, and we got into the exactly the same situation. And there’s nothing you can do about it. When I finally go to start school in Carnegie Mellon with my Brother Le, he helped me to get to school there. One day, I just sit in the library, I say, “Wow! How come all of a sudden I’m here?” It is exactly where I dreamed to be. The only difference is that we had to pay a very heavy cost. That’s what it was.
Did you get to choose whether you joined the local armed forces in 1971? And if so, why?
That was a requirement from the defense department. They need someone to guard the local area, and the police is not enough. It is best to have the local people. You know the local area, you know everybody else to do that. We just have to follow the order.
Could you tell us more about your time at the Guam refugee camp and how did you feel about it?
I still remember the morning of the April 30th when Saigon city fall to North Vietnam. My dad, we were inside the tent and my dad, coming inside, and with his radio next to his ear. And he said in one of the very sad voice “Saigon was lost.” And I felt very bad because I don’t know when I will see my friends and and my sister Chi May, my brother and even Chi Chau. We didn’t run into Chi Chau at that time in the refugee camp. So, to me, it’s a total loss. I can feel, also, the sadness in my parents, maybe 10 times or 100 times worse than me. And I’m sure my dad would never think he would be able to go back. Especially in 1954, we already moved on the north to the south. And the North Vietnam government could never ever allow them to go back. So, I just left and I go to sit down on the beach. And I just look at the ocean and say, “Hey! That’s Vietnam way, way over there.” But, you might never go back there again.
Reflections on the Journey and War
What parts of the war stood out to you the most and why?
The condition that we were forced in. I’m not in the army but most of my friends are. From the marine to the air borne and even the special forces. And they told me that, “Duc, if I don’t first, I’m dead.” And I believe that is the condition that is very difficult for anyone to be in. You are left with no choice. You got to defend and you have to shoot fast. I believe that is the first part for me to accept. Another thing is about the cruelty of the North side. It may not be the majority, but the local people, because of the hateism. Because of the differences in the society level. Once they have the control over you, they give you a very, very hard time. One example is during the Tet Offense of 1968. They occupied the city of Hue for the whole month. After that, we found so, so many graves that they just kill innocent people for no reason whatsoever. And I just don’t understand that. Okay, you fight because blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. But, not putting the innocent people in such a condition like that.
How do you think being thrust into the war as a 17-year-old has impacted your perspectives back then and now?
I think I value life a lot more between life and death. The biggest shock to me was the 1968 Tet Offense. With the Boy Scout, we go and see if any of the refugee need help. Way to the corner there, we saw a body. We don’t know how long that body was there. So, I was the troop leader, so I say “Hey! Let’s go–” At least we put something to cover the body. And when we are about, I would say three years, four years, man, it was the worst, worst smelling that I ever had.
And all three of us, we just stopped and we turned around and we ran because we just cannot stand the smell of a dead body for, again, we don’t know how many long. And I felt so bad. The body was there, see, nobody know when. We just tried to cover it and we couldn’t even do that. From that time on, I know that I’m very blessed. Every morning when I get up from bed and take a sip of coffee. My family is a very close-knit family. I think we all learned that from my dad and my mom. So even I remember my brother and sister, they go aboard and maybe once, maybe two months, we write a letter to each other. But the minute Nhan show up in the refugee camp to visit us, well, we felt so close. We are so happy. And I look at him and say, boy, you was the worst student in my high school and you made it. And he said, yup. So I told him, okay, then I shouldn’t have any problem because I have better grades than you. So we were just laughing. But I don’t think the war has any impact on our relationship.
When you were a student, what was your perspective of the U.S.? And looking back now, how did your perspective of the U.S. change over the course of the war and to now?
Yeah. On one side, one of my dreams was going abroad to study in the USA. Finally, I got my dream come true. But at the same time, you look at the price that you have to pay and you might never go back to your home country again. You might not see your friends or your sister or your brothers again. Sometimes I think too much a price to pay. To be honest with you, if you put it on the table right now and ask me which one I take, I don’t know which one I take. So at the same time, a day before yesterday, I saw the President Trump and President Zelensky from Ukraine in the White House. And it is clear to me that the United States no longer have any interest in supporting Ukraine. So they are ready to get out. They are ready to run. Just like they did 50 years ago with the South of Vietnam. A few of my friends defend the USA position. I condemn the decision of the USA. Hey, if you don’t keep the promise, if you don’t keep the commitment, why bother in the first place? You should just let them do whatever they want. Two or five years ago, don’t get involved. But once you get involved, once you make a promise, you got to keep that.
Can you describe how you felt about the outcome of the war?
The Vietnam War was a war between communism and freedom. So we always expect to win. No one want to live under communism. Look at what happened right after 1954. They killed all of the well-educated, wealthy people for no reason whatsoever. We strongly believe that we should be the winner, but obviously the result is different because of many other factors.
If you could tell your 18-year-old self anything, what would you tell them?
Whatever you believe it is, make sure that you don’t do anything that harm or hurt any other people. Again, I’m a Boy Scout, and we took the oath that we always be honest. And to me, I took those oaths very seriously. And even with Kevin, our oldest son, he joined the Cub Scout, and I keep telling him that whatever promise you make, make sure that you mean it and you keep it.
In general, how do you reflect on the war today and how has it shaped you into who you are now?
I think the biggest lesson that I learned from the war is that you never want to start it. Do whatever you need to do to resolve, any of the conflict, any of the differences, a different way, but not by forces. Because when you push the button, you expect the other side to do the same. And there will be bystander, seriously affected. And one day, when they die, there’s no way to bring them back. When the country is broken into two pieces, there’s no way for you to pull it back. So it’s best not to start it. It’s best to find another solution. I think that’s all I have.